• Filth.

    by  • December 2, 2011 • Fiction • 3 Comments

    The world was outside and it was finally over. Vivienne turned the knob shut. The dead lock slammed in its socket and rung through her fingertips, startling her more. She watched her slow hand tremble up toward the door chain, where it fumbled to hitch the bolt to its frame.

    Vivienne collapsed against the back of the door. Her knees buckled as she fought, halfhearted, against her own giving way. She sagged to the floor, legs splayed, resigned. Her purse slipped from her shoulder and sounded the cacophonous miscellany within when it dropped beside her, which only aggravated the throbbing in her skull.

    It was night inside. She was a shadow evolving through indignity: growing at the entryway, first slithering, then crawling, kneeling, reaching for side table assistance while knocking over some clunking effect before she trembled for stumbling. Her heels pounded the floor and inside her head so she shed them—now struck by the revelation of her clothes, which led her to strip.

    She molted in dull frustration from her little black dress, her black lace panties and bra. She struggled with her necklace, attempting to pull it over her head—choking—before the tension snapped, dinning pearls in a hurried storm across the hardwood.

    Blind and exposed, Vivienne made her way toward the bathroom. She staggered into the bathtub, pulled the knob, lifted the pin, and cringed under the stinging cascade that pelted down.

    She reached for the knob and turned it further.

    Steam stifled her breathing. Fetal, singed. She began to cry from the scalding pain of the water and what else. She lay in searing darkness trying hard not to think.

    And she turned the knob still further.

    And she screamed out with inhuman pitch and agony, melting in the cruelness of her condition, away in the mercy of the tide, melting in the mist of her own boiled blood, melting away in simmering skin, screaming in fear and pain and relief and gratitude for the fact of death and control over when.

    About

    Karim is a not accomplished vignettist and self-loathing philosophy major attending Columbia University in New York City, where he annoys professors and fellow majors by suggesting the existentialists had it right all along. He is a former Marine Corps journalist and was raised in a working class neighborhood in Miami, Florida.

    3 Responses to Filth.

    1. Ethan Rocke
      December 2, 2011 at 7:53 pm

      Morbid and unsatisfyingly inexplicable. Nice writing though.

    2. Joseph Andrade
      December 3, 2011 at 3:46 am

      Very passionate and human and perhaps a bit unsettling/disturbing. I liked how vivid everything is, but also very hazy and erratic, like I am stumbling along through the story along with the character. It’s quite enjoyable, albeit in a very dark way. Very good writing overall, though a few tiny cliches like “pitch dark” and “dull thud” throw off the otherwise clever and unique language a bit. But I am being very nit-picky here. Overall, very beautiful in a dark way. The story is unique and enticing, and gives you just enough information that you can gather intense emotions, without letting you fully understand the…plot (I don’t know if that is a good word for it). I really like that in flash fiction pieces.

    3. Karim
      December 3, 2011 at 10:49 am

      Wow, very helpful, Joseph. Thank you. You’re absolutely right about the clichés; now that you’ve pointed them out, they won’t leave me alone. And yes, you’ve perfectly gotten the point of this vignette in your description. Thanks.

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